1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Sorry to Hear You Lost Another Secret Hard Drive
Sorry to hear you lost another secret hard-drive It contained information so important and so vital Perhaps for Christmas it might re-arrive Gift wrapped, with a fancy new title
Top security again was breached, Head administrators could not be reached They were gone for the afternoon, relaxin’ down at Popeye’s With the hacker they got too chummy An all-night game of government Gin-Rummy The contents of the computer, was the winner’s, first prize
What’s this unnecessary uproar? Security is tighter in a Wal-Mart Store Our nuclear secrets, downloaded, have been sent There is nothing that can be finer Than atomic secrets in the hands of Red China A secret hard-drive, is now available for you to rent
Sellers have something new to hawk Buy hard-drives on the sunny streets of old New York See them pitching them, on Madison Avenue’s corner podium It quickly became a minor factor You too can build a nuclear reactor Just purchase a little of that old fashioned, rich Plutonium
The hackers were sloppy and left a hot trail Leading to a Los Alamos Sunday garage sale Hard-drives were selling along a discarded Beanie Baby How about an old child’s cowboy pistol? Or buy plans for a new strategic guided missile? Collect trade secrets, from our Air Force, Army and Navy
So God help me Mama Mia Why are they smiling in North Korea? They are turning out bombs, just as fast as Toyotas As our politicians threaten, rage and rant Up goes another, Third World nuclear power plant We need tighter security, let’s lay new taxes, on the poor voters
Sorry to hear you lost another secret hard-drive A catastrophe for the citizens of this nation So Sorry to hear that you lost another secret hard-drive The boss, now pumps gas, at the Los Alamos filling station
