1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Ode to the Carnegie Kosher Deli
Took a trip to New York a week ago The taxi meter apparently was broken The helpful cop at the subway booth Charged me triple for the subway token
Statue of Liberty, catch a Yankee game Scintillating Broadway shows to see If I only have time for one place to go I’d choose the Carnegie Kosher Deli
The aromas give off a New York High And you don’t pay for any cover Count the salamis hanging right off the wall While the waiters are fighting each other
A little Gefilte Fish, nosh on their famous knish Taste a glass of sparkling, invigorating cold seltzer Room you should make, for a potato pancake Each one blessed by Head Rabbi Meltzer
If you should wish, get a little side dish Order schmaltz with lots of tasty herring Go wash it down, with a Doctor Brown Keeps your stomach walls from tearing
The Carnegie Deli is a culinary shrine My stomach waters as we speak Leave the sacred site with a full doggie bag You’ll have enough food left over, for the week
