1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Ode to Louisiana
Here’s to Louisiana Here’s to our fifty-first state Politicians and mosquito’s And first cousins who do like to date
Take a tour in the bayou Visit the countryside and go on a romp Visit our historic plantations See dead bodies, floating in the swamp
Here’s to our elected governor He promised us, that he would not fail Neither did the one before him He’s writing his memoirs in jail
Did you see that cute little Nazi? He took our lowly state by storm Marching up and down on Bourbon Street In his plush, Third Reich uniform
Our school system we are proud of It really does fit the mold They all attain at least the fourth grade Unless they reach fourteen years old
At fifteen they reach maturity A change in life now begins A trip to the local Obstetrician Begin taking, those pre-natal vitamins
Louisiana is easily the best state Number one in the U.S.A. poll We lead the nation in obesity As we fill up our growing welfare roll
