1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Ode to a Telephone Solicitor
You call me during shower time You interrupt me when I am napping You annoy me daily at suppertime I’m furious when I am crapping
I will treat you one fine day To a dozen three foot swords If that doesn’t work, I’ll go berserk Directly aiming at your vocal chords
You are a nuisance, a pain in the ass You place my nerves on unbearable fire What will it take, a ”Please give me a break” Or strangle your neck with the telephone wire
But that won’t do, if I put an end to you They will only replace you with another I have nothing to do, so I’ll listen to you After all you are my younger brother
