1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
MEMBER LOGIN
Thank You for the Bottled Water
Thank you for the bottled water Long ago you were always free You freshly gushed, right out from the tap But now you’ve got a trace of mercury
Smoked and cured, irradiated and lasered! Make sure that it’s artesian If you go for a drink, right out of your sink On your lip, you will grow a lesion
Cola drinks and pink lemonade Are known not to be nutritious Bottled water will safely quench your thirst Even though the taste is repetitious
When you are finished with your drink Throw the toxic bottle into the sea Fish mutants will accumulate New varieties in your local grocery
Visit the plastic graveyard sites Plastic water bottles adorn the garbage dump Each bottle company secures a cute little name While you grow a cute little malignant lump
I prefer cold “Hill-Billy Water” How it is manufactured remains indiscrete Whether it originates from a stream or dam It removes the corns growing on my feet
So thank you for the bottled water I’m no longer apprehensive Look what you pay, for a small Perrier Why is bottled water, so darn expensive?
