1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Ode to the Taliban Hotel
(Heartbreak Hotel)
Since Osama left me I’m reading the Qu’iran in Hell Located in suburban Pakistan In a place called the Taliban Hotel
Baby it’s so lonely Baby, Jihad is empty Baby Can’t fight the infidels, I can cry
Can’t go to the movies Can’t take my Porsche from home Have to play cards with my seven wives Or get decimated by a drone
Baby it’s so lonely Baby, Jihad is empty Baby Can’t fight the infidels, I can cry
I belonged to the Pakistan Golf Club My barber told me jokes I ordered our Burqas from Bloomingdales I dined with the Pakistan President’s folks
Baby it’s so lonely Baby, Jihad is empty Baby Can’t fight the infidels, I can cry
Navy Seals came in uninvited We were watching Oprah like some fools The only think left of our Osama Was a few worthless, molecules
So let this be Allah’s lesson In Afghanistan I can no longer dwell Living out my days in the 17th Century In a place called the Taliban Hotel
Baby it’s so lonely Baby, Jihad is empty Baby Can’t fight the infidels, I can cry
