1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Have a Happy Birthday #2
Here’s to a happy happy birthday With last year’s it will not compare I’m getting for you a new hearing aid And an application for Federal Medicare
Your bladder is forever leaking Flatus pre-announces your arrival I’m presenting you with a year of cable T.V. To ensure another year of your survival
