1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
MEMBER LOGIN
Sorry to Hear About Your Vanishing 401K
Sorry to hear your 401K has vanished From your retirement Florida home, you have been banished It appears ahead, you got a few more working years Cancel poker night at your privileged plush pubs Sell your fancy sets, of titanium golf clubs The IRS agents found your tax file, sadly in arrears
Just when the future seemed a little bit better Social Security was cut, in the recent newsletter The Baby Boomers are now, making out their will “I’ll find a new job, one will provide increased pay” Uncle Sam will say “Thanks”, and then tax it away Our empty Treasury, needs an immediate, quick, refill
Money once flowed, like water out of fountains A little nest egg, secluded high in the mountains Your once proud 401K, will provide a Motel Six Remember Alan Greenspan, your thought he was bluffing Your booming bank account, is now next to nothing Keep voting for the politicians, getting you, into this fix
Standard and Poor, refereeing the financial race Reviewed the country’s credit, could not keep a straight face Obama immediately demanded, S&P’s retraction A disappearing 401K, the voters will learn A disappearing Obama, save us from a another inept term Pelosi next for us will sing, “I can’t get no satisfaction”
Congressman all thinking, watch keen minds come alive After the sports page, read “ The Stock Market takes a dive” My 401K, will hopefully one day, to be resurrected Advice from my accountant, and even town pastor Our government will help it, evaporate a bit faster Senate clowns, from bankrupt towns, will get reelected
Salute the welfare recipients, see how they all relax Watch football every Sunday, never pay any income tax They each have a guaranteed, healthy 401K Lets salute the CEO bankers who helped to get us all broke Drowned in bailout tax money, another government joke The middle class worker, sees his life savings, just decay
Government to the rescue, though the policy stank Get more security, out of your ancient piggy bank What will you do, when you finally reach old age? You stayed in good shape, every calorie you kept track Now all you can afford, is a greasy “Big Mac” It’s too late to become, enraged
The day has come, we all have had to dread We all have been living, way over our head The expected dooms day is called Tomorrow There was Fannie Mae and pal Freddy Mac Profits were made, and profits taken right back There was no more money that you could borrow
We desperately need firm leaders all in the know What we elected, were Larry Curly and Moe The voters got what the system perfected Congress reeks like a rotten tomato After playing the public like a violin concerto Darwin says they were naturally selected
So relax, sit back and prepare for the inevitable See our congressman, one large platter of vegetables They claim to be the best and the brightest Congressmen are smart, confident and secure See their own web site, read about them in digital manure Void of competent ideas, not even the slightest
After several debates, our congress is clearly obtunded The country is broke, Congress 401K, fully well funded Obama doesn’t know which way to turn Experience no longer, doesn’t seem to matter We get repetition, overdosed with mindless verbose chatter Obama was given four years, just to learn
Sorry to hear your 401K has vanished The final insult, of a government mismanaged Years of hard work, have gone down the drain We are led by a congress, lacking any reasoning We thought all was needed, was just a little bit of seasoning Voting the same incompetent leaders, is what we call, insane
