1-Thank you for Miss Manners
2-Ode to the Misery Channel
3-Sorry to hear you got caught hiking in Iran
4-Sorry to hear you were wiped out by a Drone
5-Thank you for Mein Summer Kamph
6-Ode to the Mexican restuarant
7-Thank you for the Big Mart store
8-Sorry to hear there won’t be an NBA season
9-Thank you for the Arab Spring
10-Sorry to hear you received a Whackocard
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Ode to "You Don't Send Me Emails Anymore"
You used to E-Mail me every hour, megabytes of peaches and cream You wined and dined me in ecstasy, in front of my computer screen Now I'm depressed, my monitor is bare, I pass up and down the floor You don't send me E-Mails anymore
I'm completely checking my inbox, it's empty I scream and pout I'm going to send to you a virus, to wipe your database right out I've been deleted from you life, booted out, and not knowing what for You don'e send me E-Mails anymore
You must have found a new E-Mail pal, the thought of it makes me cry I constantly read old messages, my keyboard is never dry My shrink told me the program is closed, the Internet I must ignore Because you don't send me E-Mails anymore
I'm putting my life on hard drive again, one day I'll be satisfied I'll find someone new to ring my mouse, from the E-Mail classified You too may get dropped from the address book, of someone you adore When she doesn't send you E-Mails anymore
